Advertisements
 

Prometheus – A Review

June 10, 2012

Every prequel is a badly told joke; the kind where the comedian shoehorns-in extra details, adding “oh yeah, and the penguin was Jewish” after the punch-line.  Prequels are even worse than a bad joke, in fact, because what they add is always unnecessary.  They’re the story before the story, based on a false premise: that the audience cares what happened before.  This is the worst kind of craven, Hollywood-thinking.  In effect, a prequel says: we’re so out of ideas, so lacking in integrity, we’re not even satisfied with copying good ideas (in sequels) any more.  We need a new way to defame the original, so we’ve come up with this: the prequel, wholly useless and asked-for by no-one.  I give you: Prometheus.

Read the rest of this entry »

Advertisements

Robin Hood – A Review

May 16, 2010

Historians reckon Robin Hood is a 16th century story. At least, the guy we know: who robs from the rich, gives to the poor, romances Maid Marion and kills bad people with a bow and arrow. I imagine Robin was pretty appealing to the average 16th century peasant…stuck in his home village, married to his homely cousin, unsure what Shakespeare was on about, or whether he was Protestant or Catholic that week. Then, as now, Robin Hood offered escapism. Our 16th century guy wasn’t bothered if Robin was real, or whether Robin spoke with a regional accent; he wanted a peasant to get one over on the rich boys. Could someone explain this to Ridley Scott?

Read the rest of this entry »